To Tell the Truth

Diaries, journals, notes in a box. Sometimes for some people, these aren’t good enough ways to say how they feel. Sometimes for some people, the feeling they have is so powerful that diaries cannot do it justice, journals cannot give them the response they need, lonely notes in a box are just a reminder that you’re alone in knowing something personal. Sometimes for some people, they just need to vent anonymously and get some kind of response, some kind of feedback, from anyone anywhere who’s listening in the slightest hope that in someway someone can make them feel…

                                                                                                                                                       less alone. 

PostSecret.com is a popular site that collects anonymous creative and artsy postcards revealing secrets. These secrets range in topic, from ambiguous to in-detail descriptions of something coming from covert creators. These cards are displayed publicly for all to see. Creating and sending these postcards isn’t everything though. So what’s is?

PostSecrets are thought provoking, tug at heartstrings, while others make you laugh. Laughing together, crying together, and generally being affected together, through separate viewing screens, may be the key to bringing us together, alone. I guess that changes things.

The PostSecret site wouldn’t be so popular if people didn’t decide these postcards are worth reading. A lot of times, we like to listen to people’s problems when they are similar to ours. It may make us feel a little less weird and kind of relieved of that alone. It may seem wrong but sometimes knowing someone has it worse than you makes you feel somehow… better. And in all, this is a great emotional time killer.

PostSecret isn’t the only site that lets us be a little ballsy. Even leaving comments on Youtube or updating a status gives us room, though not anonymous room, to be a little more emotionally revealing or a little more opinionated. It’s like our emotions are amplified and put on display and we don’t even get to appreciate the transition of our real selves into our virtual selves because we’re too caught up. For some reason, it’s not quite clear why it’s easier to write them down and post it rather than speak it out loud. My guess is we want to say some things out loud, but we become vulnerable, we have no real filter or editing system in the real world. So virtually, we can hide a little and as a result, let a little more out.

So, in accordance with this topic, I figured I would reveal a secret of my own that I’ve never shared with anyone. Keep in mind, this is not my deepest, darkest secret. It is rather pathetic, but even if you judge, I won’t be able to see your reaction. (Thus, the purpose of this blog)

And here it is:

I keep white Christmas lights on in my closet at night and convince my friends that they look chic. It’s really because I am slightly afraid at night some disfigured creature –who may conspire to eat me- will be standing where my room meets my closet. I wake up at odd hours of the night, and my eyes lead straight to the closet, heart pumping every time. After writing this down, I’m realizing it sounds ridiculously like I’m scared that there’s a monster in my closet. The thing is, I know how impractical or illogical this scenario is because I always lock my doors, disfigured things are pretty rare in the area I live, and I try to convince myself against the idea time and time again, but the fear remains.

perfectly normal.

Thanks for reading!